Seth and the Missionaries

I haven't updated the blog for three weeks now so i'll do my best to remember everything that has happened.

Paris has been doing great - i recorded a freestyle self assessment audition to see where we are at. Paris was great as i did all the transitions on the follow the rail pattern whilst riding bridleless. i tried out the lateral flexion, direct and indirect reins, back up and sideways so that any points that needed attention would be highlighted. i watched the video with Gabi and the other students and we agreed that my direct rein and sideways needed to be improved with reins before they would work without. the indirect and back up were pretty good. lateral flexion still needs work because without reins Paris kept moving his feet and i got very dizzy as he spun faster and faster trying to work out what i was trying to ask him with the carrot stick! we only managed to go for one trail ride last week and one of Paris' hoof boots flew off and it was broken in several places. i was really disappointed because he had been as impulsive as ever. i realised that on that day i had been rushed and had not been able to give him a good warm up on the ground. it proved to me that despite being as far in the program as he is, he still needs to be warmed up strong in order to get his impulsion to be better. i have been thinking about how lovely and calm he was on the fast track when we were playing with the horses on average 4-5 hours a day. i guess he responds well to that kind of workload and playing for one hour a day isn't enough for him mentally! due to not having hoof boots for him, and because we were focusing on doing zone 5 driving in the arena i haven't taken Paris for a trail ride since. it is hunting season here and on the weekends it is to dangerous to ride in the woods. Paris' changes of directions are getting really good, he seems to really understand the idea now and he has a lot of fun with it and is capable of doing flying changes in both directions, although we have to make a game of it for a bit before he will offer them. i got a few pointers from Gabi to improve my sideways game freestyle and it seemed to really help so i'm looking forward to playing with that some more. this week we didn't get to do as much as i'd have liked. the vet came last Wednesday and gave all the horses injections, Paris got the Rhino injection, and the vet recommended only walking for a couple of days. it means i have spent undemanding time with all of my horses. Paris doesn't really seem to respond to undemanding time at the moment but the youngsters i'm playing with really love it and when they see me they make an effort to come to me. this week i have ben going for bridleless trail rides with Paris. he is so cool now that i can mount him bridleless and do all gaits and transitions in the arena. i did a canter figure eight with simple change yesterday before we went on a trotting bridleless trail ride. the next step is to have him in the lead of the trail ride and on his own before i begin cantering him out on the trail. i would happily canter him bridleless in the big field because i can put him on a circle there but on the trails it is straight lines so i really need to be sure of his impulsion first. Marie-Claire has returned this week from her treatment and said she heard my freestyle riding was good enough for me to begin the game of contact! i'm going to start practising the simulations so i can train my hands to be good enough before i start doing it with Paris.

Touria has been fascinating. She had gotten a bit opinionated when i was riding and was threatening to buck all the time so i looked at my leadership. i noticed that she was much better when i was strict with things like that she should not move her feet whilst being tacked up or mounted. they are simple and obvious things really but it really reinforced just how inportant these little things are. also i discovered that she was likely to buck if she refused to disengage her hind quarters. i started to really mix things up online, for example cincle to the left, into a sideways to the right then yeild the hindquarter, yeild the foreqaurter so she is facing right, yeild the hind quarter again, a few steps of back up and then draw at a trot... suddenly she was interested, asking questions, having fun, making an effort and responding positively on a light phase one. things have gone so well that i tested our online skills at liberty. Touria is so sensitive that you can play online as if there is no rope so i guess it shouldn't have been a surprise when i played with her on her first ever liberty session and she could play all the seven games at liberty with change of direction on the circle game! the only thing missing was the stick to me and so we are now playing with that online. having made such a break through with playing with Touria i decided to apply the same principles to riding. before i was quite conservative, trying to use the levels and patterns for guidance because i was afraid of messing up this young horse. but she is so smart that she got bored very quickly. so i got on her and began to do stuff like, back up, trot forward walk transition, indirect rein, direct rein on to the rail, trot a few strides, circle the barrel back to the rail halt in the corner. back up a few steps walk on trot transition circle the round pen into a figure eight around two blocks back to the rail. soon she was no longer trying to take control because she was having fun following my ideas. suddenly i could steer her, even at a trot as i had captured her mind and the body simply followed. it has been going so well that i have even thought i'd try to canter her in the arena! she gave me a real effort but didn't quite understand what i was asking for. i'm very happy with her attitude at the moment! this week i have played with her online and she showed me hat she is ready to move on because she is getting very naughty in our normal circle game! so i started asking for change of direction and playing with improving the draw and throwing in the odd figure eight. we have been having theory lessons every day this week so had less time for practical horsemanship so when i finally had the oppertunity to ride her i did. she was feeling very opinionated and when she thought about cantering she would start to shake her head and lift her back to buck. i feel so much more confident now that i would just laugh and shake the reins to interrupt her evil thoughts and throw a different transition or obstacle her way to keep her interested in my ideas. she was really picking up on Sirius' energy. he was cantering around bridleless with Anna and so i asked Anna if we could follow her and i encouraged Touria to go until she finally took the canter. she maintained about ten strides of a very springy canter but didn't actually buck. i leapt off of her and rewarded her for her valiant effort. i'm so proud of her, we had our first arena canter!

Riva has been interesting. i had been building a nice rapport with her by treating her as a right brain introvert but we reached a point where she was confident and my long gentle persistent phase one was being met by dominant head shaking and only a quarter of a circle before she would turn in. i matched her and soon we were dramatically flying around the arena. she pulled every trick she could think of to out smart me but i matched her and threw more ideas at her and it was funny to see her face when she realised she wasn't outsmarting me. finally, with her absolutely dripping with sweat she decided to try my ideas and soon i was riding her and cantering her around the arena. she was going so well it was like magic. i rode her again a few days later but with a rather less intense online workout and her canter was much more uncomfortable and down hill. it will be interesting to see how i can get the best from her without such extreme conversations being necessary. this week I made sure i had Riva's mind before i rode. it is difficult because i think she really doesn't understand some very simple things like her responsibility to maintain gait, especially when she goes behind you. if you insist she does it but she sweats up with emotions and countercanters the left lead. freestyle she is better, i think because she had a more thorough education from her back and because she feels like she has more guidance from you, kind of like your seat is a holding hand! we had more good canters in the arena and this week i took her for a trail ride to help her keep a positive view on being ridden. once we were in the woods she was pretty forward and i just popped her behind Elvira's pony, Indy and she soon relaxed into a little trot that i could sit. i was happy to leave Riva alone and work on my independant seat whilst she enjoyed the chance of being out and about.

I have officially been given Seth as my third project horse. Online he is pretty cool and more advance than either Riva or Touria. Freestyle, however, he hasn't really started because he has been very extreme RBI about beeing ridden and violently exploded. Gabi has done a lot of flank rope work and friendly game to better prepare him and has started teaching me to build up on it. we both agree he may be better now but we are not taking any chances and are happy to take it very slowly with him. he is mostly LBE when you play online and he is so mouthy that he literally destroys every peice of rope or string he sees! he has already managed to get hold of my reins! he is so much fun and i have been set the goal of getting his online to level three!



Ok now for the non-horsemanship updates. we're pretty isolated here so when we all want to relax we tend to chill out with a movie together. it has been getting cold and we have been starting the wood fires to warm up by and that makes our evenings especially cosy. I have been talking to Elvira about her faith and about my own beliefs, pretty much ever since she arrived her three months ago. our conversations were getting very deep and i wanted to know more. i could also see how important going to church was for Elvira and how hard it was for her to have suddenly become so isolated spiritually since she arrived here. i asked if it was possible to meet up with some people from her church or visit a church and she started looking it up. Elvira is a member of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints, more commonly known as the Mormons. I didn't know anything about Mormons before apart from the fact that some people seem to find them funny. As i learned more i found that they are simply another Christian faith who have an additional scripture, The Book of Mormon, which is called "Another Testament of Jesus Christ". Elvira told me about how her brothers were Missionaries which means they were trained by the church to go to other parts of the world for at least a year and try to spread their "good news" to the world. as i have learned more i can see why they are so important. I asked if the missionaries in France could come visit us. initially i thought it would be nice for Elvira to have the company of fellow members but i was also curious and wanted to learn more about the faith. It took us a long time to get the initial appointment with the missionaries. they came to visit us two weeks ago and i was very quiet. they were two young Americans and they gave me an English copy of the Book of Mormon. they explained the importance of the book to their faith and asked me if i would read from it every night, and pray afterwards for a sign of the truth of its words. i agreed that i would. each night me and Elvira have read a few chapters outloud together and discussed what we have read. we would then take a moments silence to send a personal prayer to God. our signal to each other that we had finished praying was to move around in our bed, that way we knew not to disturb the person who had not finished (it took us a couple of nights of ruingineach other's prayers to work that one out!). The first couple of days i did this i started to feel really anxious. i was waiting for a sign from the Holy Ghost but nothing was happening. i was finding myself thinking a lot on my own about the situation and thinking that for 25 years i have pretty much ignored God and now i am ready to get to know him i was expecting him to start chatting straight away! i mean seriously a couple of days is nothing in his eyes surely! so on the third night as i was praying i found my self not asking for the truth of the words anymore. instead i found myself asking for direction for my life. i knew then that i had made a shift but it wasn't until i woke up in the morning and felt all the anxiety had gone and i had such a peace about me that i knew i had had my answer. there was no more asking if it was true. i know there is a god and he is my spirit father and wants the best for me just as my earth parents want for me. i was so happy that i walked up to Elvira and whispered in her ear "I believe!" she looked shocked and happy at the same time. since then i have had more conversations with God through the Holy Ghost and i have continued to read the scriptures and learn from the missionaries. I was caught by surprise when the missionaries asked me if i would like to consider setting a date for being baptised but again the answer came straight from me - "yes!" I am now looking forward to getting baptised in December. I have learned about the guidlines our heavenly father has set to help us look after ourselves spiritually and have given up alcohol (that wasn't hard) and tea (less convenient but not hard). knowing i need to repent for my sins i made a list of what they were and made a special prayer to God. the hardest part will be eventually forgiving myself for my sins but i am taking the necessary steps. fortunately i had taken Marie-Claire's advice of writing down lots of nice things about my self and i have found myself looking at that this week as sometimes it is pretty rough and sucky to be in repent. i am really looking forward to my baptism as a moment when i can have the slate whiped clean and i can move foward with my life. i know i am going to have to be strong to resist the many temptations i never really made much effort to resist before. in order to improve my physical health i have made a rule of no eating after 6pm and it is really working. i took this to the next step this week because nearly every day someone was making a cake or some deliciously bad for you goodies. i have been proud of myself that i have found the stength to say no when before i would have always said, "ok just a little peice" and then wanted more! it's a small thing but i think an important step for me in having the selfbelief that i can make this journey. i mean there is no point in repenting and getting baptised if you intend to carry on sinning right?!

ok i promise i'm not rying to convert anyone, i'm just very happy and wanted to share my happiness with everyone i love!

i promise i'll try harder to keep the blog updates more regular!

Jumping Jacks!

what an amazing week!

To start it off we had the Big Surprise. Saturday morning we all worked as fast as possible and had all the work done and lunch made and packed by 10.30 am. we were planning to use my car but the tire was flat and so we all piled into Peit's pickup truck. We drove for an hour and Thomas and Gabi had us play the guessing game about what we were doing. as they gave us more and more clues my stomach began to tighten and i became worried that i knew what we were doing. i had the image of climbing and abseiling and such activities - "does it involve ropes?" i asked "yes" they replied, i gulped and felt my self go introverted. i dared not ask anymore because i didn't want to know the answer. "Is it scary?" Anna asked, "Yes" Thomas and Gabi said. "Does it involve trees?" Elvira asked, "yes" they answered. after a couple of stoobwaffles Thomas was so excited he had to tell us, we are doing obstacle courses high in the tree. the first one is blue, then red and the balck one is the trickiest and is over 16 metres above the ground. i let out a tiny squeek and finally whispered, "i've never done it before" as the others finished recounting times they had done the same thing. i know my little sister had done it with her school but i had never done anything like it.

we arrived at Fantasy Forest at midday but the office worker told us the tree jumping was closed for lunch until 1.30 pm. we walked around looking for things to do. we passed by the cave entrance of the subteranean experience. it was a narrow underground passage full of obstacles that you had to crawl through. Thomas went in and it was pitch black and he came back out. i was intrigued and i climbed in. it reminded me of the school trip i did when i was 13 and we visited the trenches of World War one in Belgium and had walked through the tunnels in the dark. somehow i was less afraid here. everything was man-made and i knew there would be nothing dangerous. i crawled through on hands and knees, pushing my hands out ahead to feel the walls for turns and obstacles. there were ropes hanging in the passage that i had to push past and i was climing over a log when the tunnel filled with light. suddenly loads of french people with helmets with lamps on came into the tunnel. i could see all the obstacles and suddenly the whole thing was verfy boring. i turned back and returned to my friends annoyed by the french "cheaters" with their massive lights! we wondered around looking for a place to eat and ended up getting icecream. by then it was still only 12.30 but Thomas and Anna wanted to queue for the tree jumping so we would be first and not get stuck behind any slow people. i began to fret that i would be one of the slow people.

we hiked up a hill that was so steep you almost needed to get on hands and knees to climb it and found some picnik tables and equipment laid out. we sat down and chatted, Thomas had a nap and Anna did pilates with a tree. i was starting to get excited and agitated and wanted to move around. eventually, as more and more people arrived, a car drove up the hill and the instructor got out. he clapped his hands together and started talking in french. he pointed at the gloves, hairnets, helmets and harnesses. we all collected our equipment and gathered around the instructor who was at a frame with ropes and demonstrated how to use our clips and how to glide between the trees. as soon as he had finished we headed to the start of the first course. we managed to get ahead of everyone and Thomas and Anna took the lead, followed by Elvira, then me and Gabi behind me. it took me a while to get good with my clips, at first i wa wasting a lot of time fumbling with them. one of th first things we did was walk along a wire holding one that was susspended above us. there were three wires above us, one that the harness was attached to, and one for little people and one for tall people. i chose the little people wire, being only 157cm, but it meant my arms were bent and i really had to brace them ad the wires rocked and wobbles. Elvira, only 5cm taller than me, had taken the higher one but she could barely reach and went across like she was on "the rack" in a torture chamber. we then had to cross a series of swings, of various designs, some were planks, boards, poles or just wires, some went to anf fro others from side to side. we had to cross nets and swing on ropes, slide down the zip wires and pull ourselves along. i was starting to enjoy myself and get more self confidence but i still felt too slow. as soon as we finished the blue course we went for the more challenging red course. having been the first to complete the bule course we were the first ones to start the red. this one went higher into the trees and the challenges were more difficult. the swings were further apart and i had to jump between them because i was too small to step across. we came to an obstacle we call the stirrups. it was two parallel lines of stirrups hanging from red ropes but at staggered heights. it was tricky to keep stablility but i managed to get mine so still that i could not reach the next stirrup! in the end, after my foot had slipped all the way through a stirrup and i ha the image of breaking my leg, i decided the best was through was to let go. i dropped all the stirrups and let the clips of the harness take my weight and slid down to the end ready for the next obstacle. the course ended with a zip wire to a rope ladder on a tree. if you missed the ladder you would slip back and hand to pull yourself along the line. i watched Elvira wizz down so fast but she missed the ladder. i took my turn and jumped off. i started spinning in my harness but i managed to steady it facing where i was going and i pedalled my feet in the air like scooby do trying to keep up the speed so i would reach the ladder. i caught the ladder with one hand but then had to pull myself up and for a moment i was stuck. i reached my free hand up to the zip line and pulled myself closer to the tree until i could swing at it and grab it with both hands. i then had to disconnect the harness before i could climbdown. i was so pumped, i felt great! we all decided we needed a drink and toilet break before taking on the hardest and highest course. i had no hesitations this time. i climbed everything as fast as i could, i jumped through the swings, shuffled, slid, pulled, pushed, dragged kicked my way through the course. at one point we had another swing rope, my least favourite obstacle, and as i swang across the gap i managed to hit my eye on a safety cable! it wasn't too bad but came up red straight away. i felt on top of the world as i raced to the finish and felt capable of acheiving anyhting. Gabi and Thomas had said that our surprise would be a test of emotional fitness, balance and attitude and it certainly was!

we topped of the most amazing day ever with go-karting (on the most dangerous go-karts i have ever een in my life!) and mini-golf (i think an even biggger test of emotional fitness than the tree jumping!) and then went to McDonalds for dinner! we never eat fast food here so it really made it feel like a true excursion!

on Sunday i could feel my muscles but nothing as bad as i had expected. i played with Paris online and he was having so much fun. he was pretending he didn't know what a change of direction was so i would give him the oppertunity to change and if he didn't take it i would "close the door" behind me as he went past. he quickly was putting effort into changing direction and was doing amazing flying changes from left to right and cool simple changes from right to left. he felt so connected that we played stick to me at liberty in the bg arena whilst the others played with their horses. Anna had set up a big jump and i asked PAris to stick to me and go over it but it was a bit too much and he took off but i soon had him back. i went online and did more stick to me and this time he popped the jump without issue as if to show the others how it's done! he is the coolest horse in the world!

 i had a small session with Riva  and began thinking about my goals for the week ahead. Cindy, one of the girls i did my 10 day trial in january with, arrived with Rianna to start their 6 month working student placements.

On Monday we set our weekly goals. For Paris i planned to get a calmer canter and get canter trot transitions without reins, i also plnned to get flying changed from right to left and really start zone 5 driving which i have been meaning to do for ages. For Riva i had found that her friendly game in motion was broken, especially with the carrot stick and savvy string so i wanted to fix that with a view to leading to the Karen  Rolf stretching exercises. i also planned to do freestyle patterns, corners game with her and transitions on the trail. With Touria i planned to really get her thinking with puzzles like push the ball and carrot hide 'n' seek, as well as have her start the karen Rolf stretching exercises, as she always trots with her head up and using the musclse underneath her neck rather than over her back.

Paris has been amazing this week. he has been so playful and cheeky. he was cantering in a steady calm manner. it is still a big canter by most people's standards but that is his working canter and the pace he is comfortable with. he was so left brained and did not have a right brained take off all week. i was so pleased with how he was going i even tied the reins to my saddle with the savvy string and did canter circles with trot to walk to halt to walk to trot to canter transitions without reins. the hardest transition to get was the trot to walk. he either wanted to be jogging or grazing! at one point he even started grazing whilst doing a big relaxed trot - talk about left brained! he has become very playful online, making big efforts to do flying changes and changes of direction. i took the plunge and asked for a lesson on zone 5 driving. it was really cool - a few simple things and we were doing transitions and indirect rein with one rein in zone 5. the main thing was for me to keep physical contact with zone 5 with stick or hand until Paris really gets the idea. at first he was confused and kept trying to turn and face. i ran as fast as i could to keep up with his spinning hind end until he stopped and he worked out that he got comfort whilst i was in zone 5. first we started with indirect rein which is applied just like in the saddle but the rope applies steady pressure to his inside hind leg. he was over-reactive to this at first but i kept the rope on him until he was calm. the porcupine game is about appropriate response to pressure, not avoiding all pressure. he was thinking a lot about doing circles around me rather than accepting me behind him. my position was very important, i had to keep myself right behind his tail, which was harder than it sounds, but everytime i came out to oneside it put pressure on zone 4 and he would think about disengaging resulting in him doing smaller circles. once he was comfortable with me in zone 5 and could disengage i asked him to move forward, i lifted my energy and rythmically tapped his hind end. at first he took a step backward because our only previous communication in zone 5 had been backward lead by the tail. i walked back but maintained the tapping, doing it in phases. after a couple of trips through the four phases in four phases he stepped forward and i rubbed his tail. soon i had walk halt transitions from zone 5. next i lifted my energy and put a trot in my body and he was able to trot, as soon as i walked he would go back to walk. i am now so excited about playing more in zone 5. i was tired and sweaty after our session because it involved quite a lot of running! zone 5 driving will get me fit!

This wasn't my best week with Touria. she is now really questioning my leadership and when we were trail riding she was threatening to buck by lifting her back and snaking her head down. i would use a rythmic pop motion to keep her head up and interrupt her evil thoughts but i knew it was still there. on tuesday it was so bad she was doing it at a trot and i dared not allow her to canter. yesterday we tried a differnet saddle with her. this one is a western type saddle and when i cantered her online with it she bucked, i slapped the ground to send her forward and she took off bucking and bronking, i ran around the arena with her, matching her energy and slapping the ground until she was in a forward canter with no bucks. we did this several times on each rein until she was offering my a nice canter without bucks from phase one. her steering is not getting any better although i have found she is best if i do the level one "kicking the naked parachuter" direct rein method. i am fascinated about how to get her mind and her respect.

Riva has been very interesting this week. i began doing lots of friendly game, especially in motion. i was waiting for signs of her being left brained before i would quit and she has responded really well. when it came to doing any of the other games i was much softer and slower in all my phases, and treated her as if she were a right brain introvert. her first response is usually to brace and then she gets into an argument but my new tactics gave her nothing to brace against. she has become soft and sweet and much more relaxed and trusting! with her circle game she would always turn in after a few strides. if i increased my phases as she expected me too she would run to the end of the line and keep tension in the rope and shake her head and then turn and face anyway. so this time i would simply repoint and wait. she knew what she needed to be doing and after some time to think and when she realised that i was being passively persistent in the proper position she actually started to maintain the walk on the circle. we have built this up to the trot and had some nice canter transitions. i have started riding her in the arena in the bareback pad too - she gets tense and hesitent very easily and it is amazing how much more you feel through the pad. her trot is so comfortable though! i was hoping to do corners game with her but when she is alone in the arena she gets quite unconfident and so i did passenger, touch its and a weave pattern on a circle. I'm really pleased with how she has softened toward me, she is such a sweet horse really.

it will be really interesting to see how things develope next week with each of my horses!